maddness

i'm going to depression again... i'm feeling tormented by the feelings in my heart and brain... i have no one to turn to but my blog...
i can't help but feel that everything that happened has to be something more or less to do with my personality...
i would cry to myself when i'm alone... i maybe a happy-go-lucky person but there are unhappy feelings underneath my happy face... what can i do to make my life better, i've got no idea...